Sunday, November 8, 2009

Cannot sleep

Dear B and W,

Here I sit, not able to sleep, hoping and praying that you will love your new school. Daddy is fast asleep, not too concerned with tomorrows big events. But I am awake, thinking and worrying, as usual. Today I inadvertently read the news online. I hate the news. I hate reading about terrible things happening to people all over the world. Things that are completely out of my control. And I cannot help but to picture the two of you, and your sweet, smiling faces and chubby, little legs...your voices, your laughs, your tears. The way that you Brody, seek me out when you are in pain or scared, and how you Wade, are my little independent soul, swinging by for a hug every now and then. Still babies in my eyes, both just on the cusp of being a child. Still unable to do much for yourselves. Still dependent on others. And I want to be there for every single laugh and tear and boo-boo and pain, but, as I will do for the rest of your lives, I am letting you both go and watching you both grow and explore your little world, and this is just pre-school. The one year old class, for heavens sake, and I cannot sleep. This is just how much I love you both.



Baby Bergin said...

oh "school"...matt and I spent Wednesday on our "school" search. It was very depressing and scary to see some of these places. Luckily, there are great places out there and, as difficult as it may seem, they will all be okay and learn some great new things from "school". Good luck, I can only imagine how hard this day must be!